The Broken Man Dream
Last night I had the strangest dream. There was an old man who was an alcoholic. He had lived through a great tragedy in his life and was still making himself suffer for it. Throughout my dream, I tried to talk to this old man, to reason with him, to save him. Each attempt was a failure and in the end I found myself being dragged down into his misery. I was trying to free myself from this miserable feeling when I woke up.
Upon waking I knew that this was an important dream, so I worked hard to remember it before it slipped away. As I mulled the images in my mind, I realized that this person I was trying to save is the negative person that I’m currently working for. The final clue (besides the incredibly negative vibe) that it was my current employer was that his ringtone was a Rush song (his favorite band).
For several weeks now I’ve been contemplating leaving. It won’t be easy since my departure will be very difficult on the company. But I have to leave, for my own sake. I cannot take his misery anymore.
Now before you think I’m just writing a slam post, I’m actually embarking on a journey to change my life. I want to spend more time on the things that I want, and less on someone else’s dream. As Billy Joel once said:
I had a friend and we used to be real close
Said he couldn’t go on the American way
Closed a shop, sold a house, bought a ticket to the West Coast
Now he gives them a standup routine in L.A.
I can’t go on the American way. Not sure about doing standup in L.A., but I know that I would prefer that to what I’m doing.
More to come.
